Wikileaks - a glitch in the matrix of sleep?

When Gordon Brown forgot to turn off his microphone after an interview with a voter that he found frustrating, his frustrations expressed themselves in a judgemental outburst of opinion against the voter to whom he had felt obliged to be diplomatic with in person.

He was vilified for this - even though such behaviour is in one way or another, normal, for very very many human beings.

The separation of public and private communication is the act of secrecy and guile or self serving strategic presentations so as to protect a mythological self - which itself a strategy of attempting to compartmentalize and manage irreconcilable beliefs, thoughts and desires.

The psychological or mythological self is a kind of self-mesmerising propaganda whose first charge is to attract, engage and manipulate one’s own attention and perception so as to seem to validate or serve the interests of one’s self image.

We then come to believe our outward assertions even though they are inconsistent with our private thoughts and belied by our actual awareness.
We live as if our opinions were in any way fact - or as if our own private thoughts were in any way true.

This is such a normal element of human culture and communication that it is rendered almost invisible - and our notions of normalcy and sanity tend to be based on such lack of honesty as the ‘honest’ management of what is regarded as human nature.

Underneath the superficial presentations and illusions of civilisation is held to be stark, brute - if not demonic - self will. That unbridled would rape, plunder and destroy or seduce, usurp and possess.

The fear that this is so is enough to prevent the discovery that it is not so in the way that our fear makes seem. For at back of all private or secret agenda for self interest - is fear, insecurity, disconnectedness and distrust.

So our rampant self-will is suppressed yet used in secret amidst the guise of communicating - yet without allowing real communication to occur. For the nature of the mentality is that of managing and manipulating based on prior assertions of self - rather than discovering and meeting life - oneself - in each other.

Yet life is beyond managing and our attempts to do so only reinforce our self delusion - which seems undeniably real to us in our mutually interacting mythological or psychological one-up-man-ship.

When our cover is blown - when the lid is removed - the exposure tends to be experienced as humiliating loss, pain, shame and weakness. Damage control seeks to avoid this. But that is still living out from the delusional basis and attempting to get back under cover and put the lid on whatever is seen as the problem. Seeking to restore self-illusion as a consistent sense of reality.

But in crisis and catastrophic systems failure we also experience being open. And in apparent powerlessness we also experience something of the nature of trust and of being genuine; open with our own being and straight with others. Where we cannot afford to lie.

Until some measure of awakening to the true nature of the mind, and a direct appreciation of life becomes our responsibility - the ‘defensive mechanism’ of a false sense of self runs unchecked and by default.

In assertion of a falsely based sense of self we experience everything ‘through a lens darkly’. We see anything that undermines our ‘self interest’ as enemy - and in one way or another seek to limit, deny or kill it.

The opportunity of uncovering such a mentality within ourselves is not to react according to its ‘laws’ - but to stop, listen, and wait for the wisdom that must arise in our own hearts because we have made welcome for it instead of operating an exclusion zone.


Pray to say - and get out of the way

Let this mind be still of self judgement.
Let this heart be open to this moment.
May all things rest in my awareness,
with no story of division.

I come to ask, as I am moved,
and moving, meet resistance;
a mind in me that calls on guilt,
in darkness of exclusion.

Let me hear true!
I want to hear true,
for the being of life,
and the seeing of life,
as one with true.

I have thought my way into a maze and think I must think my way out.
Reveal to my mind the simple light of truth!
I felt my feelings condemn me in a dark and lonely hell.
Reveal to me my Self - where peace extends!

I wanted you dear heart, to be with, and to be with me,
in form that touched me in desire to be so known and oh so loved!
And made of you an idol of loss, of limitation, fear and guilt.
for I believed the the lonely thoughts - that say I am as they,
and longed for love as if my self was unlike love.

So help me,
and let me know Thy Help,
help the love, you Be me,
know itself directly.

Paths within a world unlove,
cannot be found.
They are not there!
And seeming lost, abandoned, sense,
that I, in mind, does err,
Attending thought in false pretence,
as if a worthy prayer.
I made myself experience,
of world that isn't there.

A prison painted out.
Imaginary walls,
exclude the life,
lock in, the demon thought,
that turns the spit,
the guilt fire pit.
That paints the sham,
to hide from shame,
but knows full well,
impotent spell.
For love lost, cost,
all that lives,
and mere things never,
such life give.

Unless from the cell, and spell undone,
is shifted to the Living One.
In dream forsaken -  let me then forsake,
abiding sleep - I wouldst awake!
for love’s true need,
above my sake.

Holy Spirit in the heart,
listening for peace.

Listening for peace in my heart.
Resting in desire for peace.
Let peace be in my heart!
Let peace be in thy heart!
May peace be.
And be in peace,

A mind unwhole in agitation,
was here as if my own.
Let peace restore me from,
i will
to let myself be still ...

brian in a moment


Awakening to the real world

I am not inclined to be critical of any living being - but when there is an assertion that purports to be true and yet is not true, I feel the authority of life - the innate right - to speak as I am moved to speak.

If I were reacting against error - I would make it real to myself. That is not my desire.

When anything is humanly held to be truth that is not true, it has to be asserted, maintained and defended - because its real power is given it by its makers, who identify, and are justified to themselves thereby.

The human world experience is an alloy of both wheat and tares because it is the effect of confusion of both the true and the false.

The primary error is the belief that it is up to 'us' - or me or you - to determine truth. For such is the constitution of an 'orphaned' or 'divorced' mind.

All attempts to heal, or bring harmony and accord, have - or use - an element of truth, but until truth awakens to its own there is the underlying liability of a false self serving will. Which always brings discord and suffering even if it seems to temporarily please a partial perspective.

Recognizing this liability, has brought into play what Raj calls 'negative cooperations'; the designed and agreed arrangement of checks and balances to constrain the excesses of the exertion of power. These may also express and appeal to a higher level of responsibility, toward a greater sense of shared life than a blind self interest.

However, a blind self interest, sees and uses all things to gain personal advantage - without real or heartfelt regard for truth and makes a moral superiority of validity for itself out of truths that would - if brought into realization - correct the mind of its blindness and restore to truth in wholeness.

The world-in-limitation works like a veil to distorts miracle impulses, (communication), such that love seems to be a weak power struggling amidst opposition to act or have effect. This is because power - in terms of belief, attention and identification - is given to fear.

Your mind given to fear wills yet to ‘be free’ to limit love, that a part from it you can experience for yourself.

This can be seen as a freedom expressed - but not extended - for the freedom to deny love in favour of a partiality is to limit the limitless. Within the framework of such experience, limitation is also the tool by which the experience is managed.

Yet all of the experience of limitation is founded on - and in - the desire that a part from Truth you can experience for yourself.

The mind in chaos tends to contract, withdraw and regain its sense of stability from association with that which gives it validity as good - or at least works against the rising fear to stem the flood.

But the flood of chaos is but a misperception of life, to a mind locked into control, that is dicovering it has no control.

When the world is changed it is because the dream of how it was thought to be is simply not supported. This is the great opportunity to flip from wanting truths - for yourselves to weave another dream - into letting truth move your desire.

But be comforted - that even in error, is your true awareness present and abiding. Awaiting your welcome.

This is true for all. All are welcome in the awareness of God.

May we use the structures of limitation to dissolve the fears that demand limitation.
May we embrace the loves of the world in a deeper trust as being the love - beyond persons, beyond flags or loyalties to anything external to the Movement of Being Itself - for Which and in Whom let no substitute, image, symbol or concept, interpose itself.

Our every thought is a vote - not in a real contest - but in the densifying or enlightening of experience. As long as we vote with the thoughts that make the world we will have it. Yet in any thought that is truly shared - we are restored instantly to awareness.

There is a political aspect to the Kingdom of Heaven - in exactly the wise that Jesus and many others demonstrate - but it is free of the politics of fear, of coercion, of deceit and guile.

"What would love have me do? What is the Father's Will? What is the true desire in the silence and trust of the heart?"

Here is no template employed, nor database of holy answers and solutions applied in presumption of righteousness.

What does this trust embodied,look like? Perhaps it looks like working with the enemy, or betraying the principles that uphold all that is conceived lawful and just, or as a masking deception with supernatural power. Because to the mind in the grip of fear, love cannot be real - otherwise the love of self-in-struggle can no longer be supported.

For to love, there can not be an enemy - but that it becomes the way to listen more deeply - and in willingness extended - be healed of a shadow power.

Only the heart communicates, and rejoices in communion.

The mind judges and accords 'communication' to that which validates what it already asserts.

Seek therefore the messengers of love that are open secret. Release the mind in judgement by not listening there.

If there are particular issues at the level of nations or social or political matters, then let us address them each for what they reveal - and not amidst a presumption of identity that demands or insinuates blind allegiance.

I do feel the wave that realizes usurpation has occurred and is yet active. But I do not address the effects in the world - for to keep it in the world is to keep the addiction to usurpation.

There are always those in every walk of life and function who are open to communication. But not to manipulation or coercion.

If we need peace as the condition in which love is known - then we need to look in terms of willingness to listen and show listening is true by the quality of response. But until a fundamental trust is uncovered - we listen not - but interpret. Love is an intimacy in which judgement cannot intrude - and in which apparent past intrusions have clearly had no effect.

Our own acceptance of atonement - of perfect love - is the gift through which the world is undone of  a density of guilt.

Therefore observe the mind that limits or withdraws or contracts - rather than let it act through you.

Miracles are the communication of love within the dream, that speak for you awake.

In Peace



Know Thyself

What is the function of Mind?

And therefore of Life?

"Know Thyself".

Extension or projection is the Law of Mind.

This never stops nor can be changed.

To know yourself truly is to be the extension of Mind - which then 'gives' itself to All - through you.

To know yourself partially but falsely is to 'give' the mind of an illusory self and meet it in everything and everyone. As a 'separated whole'.

The game of 'choose between' is the play of the mind in creating a sense of private experience - that in turn creates a sense of a self that seems to exist and act independently. As if Creation - the Extension of Mind - is a realm of things - there for a "you" to pick and choose between - so as to triumph over it.

While this game is being acted out and suffered as real - it brings polarized experience of good - and bad, of loving - and hating, of me - and you, of us - and them.

The Remembrance and Rewakenening of truth is unreasonable Good - because it is Good beyond question and without opposite or comparison. It is acceptance and appreciation in trust of all that is - as it is - with no imposition of interpretation as to what it is.

Far from being nothing - this willingness or receptivity - allows all that Life is - to function as a unified Wholeness - in your conscious experience.

What then of the problematic nature of a polarized existence and the dilemma of the self that seems to suffer it?

It becomes a true gift - by your willingness to listen and accept truth. Not truths that can be mouthed. But an honesty of heart in which the mind is quieted and true direction regained - aligned as Expression of One Will.

As to transcending the laws of physics  - I would say that the ego projects the mind of lawlessness - and that creates an overlay experience of forces in opposition, density of guilt , exploitation of power, subjection to an alien will and a mechanism of death.

One can think of this as a net in which the more one struggles the more entangled one becomes. And with every usurpation of power in self-seeking, comes the subjection to the rules you set by its abuse.

Awakening is the undoing of guilt, of error, of a fanciful self-regard that may have begun as a masqerade but became a death mask - and a trap. A meaninglessness.

"Seek first the True Kingdom of the Heart  - and all things will be added you".

This is simply the reversal of the ego's dictum:

"Seek to add all things to yourself and lose the True Kingdom of the Heart".

The mind that identifies itself in form will interpret experience as forms - but in awakening, we are weaned from a form based perception.

It is not 'things' that are added to us in the Kingdom - but that the Kingdom is the Expression of the indivisible nature of the attributes of God.

Right where you thought yourself to be - BUT - only as you extend what you receive in truth.

If we limit our giving - we give limitation.

What is giving?

It is the acknowledgement of value.

The un-withholding of the mind from its Source and Nature.

The work is your gift to yourself of the surety that you freely choose to value freedom - by willingness to overcome or put aside all desire to value the valueless. But until this becomes clear - is it not enough to live from a willingness to follow the path with a heart?

If we feel we have to do things - know you are free to do them from the heart and for the heart. Do them for your own - guided - reasons - even if it also looks like 'you have to go to work to share the supply of needs met'.

Things are fixed by opposition - or set free by acceptance.

Trust and accept the life that is given - not as your interpretation gives - but as a reconnect through which the next step reveals itself.

Just to share life is to have 'stepped out' of the laws that apply to embodied minds in space and time.

Without this 'step' the wheels are not even touching the road.

To pause - is to suspend judgement. To listen in trust is to allow Creation to be as it is - and be known truly.

Give - only - as you would - in truth - receive.

in Gratitude



Reason Awakening

Insanity or unreason noticed - is a goad to awakening.

When I see the treatment of man to man - and of man to beast and of man to his world I see much that is hellish - for this is the out picturing of the Son's attack upon Himself.

This is impossible - as One cannot split or truly hold opposing minds - except in belief born of a wishful imagination.

Self-illusion is not undone by dealing with the effect - but by looking clearly at the cause - and finding it causeless.

All that speaks the death of love is of the suggestion that another power is at work - against love - against life. This can not be.

Yet while we seek and assert to be a power unto ourselves, so shall the attack on truth be held real in the mind that possesses itself in secret and experiences itself threatened, isolated and in terms of opposition.

When we see our frailty and death in others we share it and strengthen it.

When we receive truth from our Brothers, we have looked beyond the suggestions of death.

We cannot look beyond that which we are afraid to see - and so we must be willing to look on hate and fear without judgement - truly - if but for an instant - in which our minds may be healed of the self-damning judgement that seeds a recurring experience of suffering, sickness and death - no matter how passionately is enacted the will to regroup within a fragmented mind.

Awakening itself is the Reason for awakening.

It stirs beneath and before a thought occurs - and undermines the capacity to see reason in a self apart. And so do new thoughts and perspectives rise, step by step, that lead from hell to Hello!

Interpretation, Identity and Desire

At the core of the Buddhist teaching are "the Four Noble Truths":
There is suffering. There is a cause to suffering. There is an end to suffering. There is a path out of suffering.

These certainly appeal to a desire to be free of suffering and guide to a true freedom rather than pseudo freedom in which suffering is hidden, minimized via distraction and denial and dissociation or re-branded as propaganda for a blame driven agenda.

In Buddhist terms I understand attachment as the cause of suffering, not desire.

Differentiation, identification and desire is a process of false or perverted desire. It is a process observable in mind - and by simply being observed , the desire is not acted out from, an identification with thought becomes impossible, and the underlying wish to see and judge in terms of form-based meanings dissolves for lack of support.

But yes, of course, all things are misinterpreted, inevitably, if pre-existing definitions are used to filter and program experience.

True desire - is "The Movement of Be-ing". It doesn't arise from - nor is distorted by the lens of - a separate self sense.

Be still - and know - God.

The ego sense is hopeful that it can become still and then have Truth added to it - so it will suggest the misinterpretation of a simple invitation or teaching into a hopefulness of attempting the impossible; of making reality validate, fit into and serve an illusion.

And as we all know - this is a very serious business!

But in Realization, gravity flips to levity, and light-ness of being, edgelessly dissolves into the Clear Light of Always.

in Gratitude



The Meaning of Life - an insoluble question?

What is the meaning of life?

You truly are the Meaning of Life.

But while you persist in acting out from a belief that you are as your thinking defines you to be - you program your mind to seek in externals, outside you - and in some other moment than the one in which you are.

Definitions are judgements in which a meaning is ascribed to something which is then held to be true or accepted as fact.
As this becomes a preference to use one’s own ‘knowledge’ rather than embrace relationship anew - the mind enacts a withdrawal from present relational be ing into a judgment based and arbitrary mapping of presumed or inferred meanings that seems real - yet is not grounded in a present and heartfelt relationship.

To be experiencing as if outside a present and heartfelt relationship is to be in confusion of identity and in conflict with reality. It is also to be grappling with meaninglessness as if it could be made sense of.

Therefore, within the experience of a sense of self that is uncertain, conflicted and in ignorance or confusion as to its true nature and identity, awakening is the meaning of life. Yet this is not truly an end point or goal capable of accomplishment. It is not added to you. It is already true - but through awakening, You - as you are - in your relational wholeness -  is revealed and accepted as true. Therefore one’s life becomes the expression of that awareness. You are known by your fruits, but what you are is defined only in the living instant of truth revealing itself - as it is - through You.

The filtered search for meaning in conceptual terms will only find partial aspects of the nature of Life’s Meaning - and these may be invested with belief and used as a source of identification. But this is not the same as being perfectly identified by and as one with, the Process or Movement of Unified Be ing.

In this sense you are identified by the love that you share, that moves you and moves through you. And in such indivisibility of be-ing there is no desire to pause, step outside the heart, and listen to thoughts that posit meaningless questions to the only place that knows nothing - the disconnected mind.

So Who is asking what the Meaning of Life is?
If it is but your thinking, then you can use the question to think some more. But if it is a question in your heart, then follow it down to its roots. For where your heart is, You are. If your heart is denied by a self-protecting mind, then you will not let your own Answer through until you lay down your defences against feeling. You will not allow this until you begin to trust yourself and you will certainly not allow this until you have uncovered an essential honesty that can pass beyond the personal and cultural blocks to the direct awareness and appreciation of love.


Peace on Earth?

For my part I see that until we recognise the working of misidentification within our own mind - we will play out the drama of a house divided. Yet the Spirit of God is one - so if I see division or conflict I am yet looking through the lens of a conflicted mind. Identification with self image is not the truth of our being - yet while we want it to be true we assert and defend it - not only against those to whom we give the role of 'other' or enemy - but against allowing the conditions in which healing would become necessary and obvious. Simply because all things are judged in terms of gain or threat to the self we accept as true.

To be able to bring the mind to look upon and re-evaluate its own identifications of belief and experience is the work of Grace - (not the intervention of an Outside Power - but the opening within of a Prior Nature or Condition). The willingness to accept wholing is a shift in purpose and perspective that becomes an awakening of life from true roots. This willingness becomes the purpose to which all experience must be surrendered of the interpretations that arise from the limited and limiting illusion of self will. Because this is freely undertaken as the heart's truth - it is a discovery of miracle, true joy and compassion - and not one of martyrdom, sacrifice or self denial.

But those latter are the expectations of the unawakened mind, to whom the touch and reminder of the demonstration of the Living Spirit is truly helpful in passing through fear. "Of myself I can do nothing" - but in willingness to be used by Spirit nothing will be left undone.

To be willing to look upon the horror of the split in our mind at its root and become free of the compulsion to 'do' anything from our own thought or judgement, is to 'hold the hand' of our Spirit and be restored to the vision that sees past all appearance to the Eternal.

From such a Wellspring - is the world 'made anew', for the desire that acted out from a past that seemed to have denied, killed or lost the Innocence of Being - is undone of any basis of identification or meaning. Such a peace is not a counterpart of war - but is Perfect Inclusion - or perhaps it is closer to say without any division or exclusion of all That (it) Is.

In Peace



Rules and Law, Grace and favour

2010-09-04 Rules and Law, Grace and favour

The Cause and Event of God is all there Is - beyond all good and evil - yet the rules of the mind of judgement apprehend not and see instead a world of separated things and people.

The mind that is full of its own will - or judgements asserted and defended - does not see, does not hear - and 'lives' out it's story as if it were real.

It is never the act at the level of form that matters - but the desire or movement of the heart. The prayer of the heart moves in us constantly - but if we do not be still of false desires, then we remain unaware of our own true desire. 

Grace may open as it Will - but it is never coercion - you must in your heart accept. In accepting the Will of love - you must accept the way of laying down your will. For your will is the refusal of love in favour of a special partial love - that God knows not.

The true miracle is the love that inspires all miracles.
Because we think we already know what love is - we justify ourselves in thought.
But this is the way of forgetting.

The world and the self that seems within it - are the experience arising from the rules that we have in ignorance accepted as true - and believed to be protective of us. Miracle experience is witness to that the world is not Lord over you. But it is not the self-role within the dream that has dominion. Whether you recall it or not - you, as you may think yourself to be - entirely surrendered to and accepted the Will of God - if for but an instant.

There are no rules to love - how could there be? Love's law is our very being.

That is why - despite our preoccupations with what we think we are and what we think we are attaining or failing to attain - love rises up and witnesses to the law of being - which cannot be altogether covered over or replaced by the laws of judgement - or believing and thinking.

Yet our insistence in our 'self' and world dictates the laws by which we will accept healing - even though they have no reality apart from a wish the self they support be true.

Our Holy Spirit is that Awareness which is ever present throughout the entire process of identifying with and by judgement - and knows the step by step way of bringing the mind in confusion of many, back into the acceptance of the one light of truth. Therefore it seems to work in the world with us in our dream as if we are in the situation as we believe - because that is where it can regain our attention. But always to serve the learnings that wean us from the will and its judgements in a way that awakens and yet does not feed or reinforce the guilt and terror that set the mind in confusion.

Rules are imposed upon and are used to control. They are illegitimate because they are not expressing true authority - but are the result of struggle: the blind leading the blind. In this mode "the way things work" is a phrase that means tyranny, fear and death.

Law is discerned in the oneness or union of heart and mind. It can be wholly accepted in the heart as true for it is not made by man. In this mode "the way things work" is a phrase that acknowledges eternal peace. For the perspective of oneness is not engaged in struggle - but sees even this, as it is.

Oh I know! - the egoic thinking can take ANYTHING and make a guilt trip out of it. Maybe when we see it in the midst of our so called spirituality - we'll realize that our hiding place doesn't work - and that we do not want to hide.

The mind is always active and never stops. Because we miscreated - or believed fantasy was really true - we have come to fear our thoughts and the Power that Mind Is.

My sense is to let love undo the thoughts by which I hurt myself - and trust that the nature of Mind expresses itself without distortion.
In this way I am not concerned to become or demonstrate anything for myself - for that is the thought by which madness seems real. Rather I grow willingness to accept the relationship that holds all things sane and in which all things - in their season - bring fruit in a shared Light.


Feel the way, share the gift

To resolve to try to do something is like starting out with failure built in. As if one's certainty of willingness and desire is lost to some 'other power' under which you are powerless. But even here you may simply notice a game played out - and then - all the roles are merely the picture of a wish to play games.

Truth can be accepted as it is or it can be delayed acceptance through a wish to see as it is not. The Noticing is not via thought or interpretation - but is direct appreciation. The forms that may clothe such insight are the language that you can currently understand and accept - but they are never conclusions or definitions. The realisations you receive may not be currency for others - but the shine of your being that is innate to your true nature - is a universal blessing.

Within the radiance of your love is your gift. A withheld life is a mind game but the radiance of love is not other than the pure light of awareness.

"My meaningless thoughts show me a meaningless world?"

Then look again with innocent eyes - the fresh native curiosity of you. Let your starting place be the directness and wholeness of one you do not ‘make’.

In such a living current, we feel our way in the peace of an unconflicted desire, movement or guidance. Not only in terms of discerning each step - but we feel the way as the context of all that is.

When peace is not felt, we have gotten distracted by thought. Rest the mind. Allow the Movement to register with you presently. Live out from Being - and not out from thinking.

Share the gift.


Light Reading

I smile to read you in a playful poesy.
Words can feed dictums, dogmas and downright lies.

The light of the projector rises through the film to shift attention from the movie plot of projected identifications to the awakening of the light itself. A clarity perfect, inclusive and all pervading, the very light of perfect love - whose modification as hues and forms through the prism of its own thought in no way changes the light or the nature of love.

A game is a game while playing is a joy - but when one tires of the game it is to be cast aside, let go, move on. The game of becoming a someone is a game of hide, and seek.

The idea is not to never get found. The idea is not to seek forever.
The idea is to play together. Expressing the togetherness of love in play.
Togetherness is not many.

When the children hurt themselves, they return to their parent and be held.
They are righted of their fears of wayward fancy and are restored to be-hold.

Mind is creative.
True creation is aligned with the Father's Light.
The Light and Nature of the First.
One without a second.

The Son is the Father's love and not a thing apart.
The Movement of "I Am That I Am" is no lonely ghost.
The veil of self apart is to be transcended - in place.
You cant let go of that which you are trying to become or overcome!

True love awakens the mind from its distractions.
At first it is as if the dream becomes perfect.
But then the light within knows itself anew,
in the always ever new.

Words fall off the page
meanings dissolve in laughter
there's no one here to catch them
Too close to love, nowhere else to be from which to speak.
Let all be as it is, and unsaid, let all be revealed.

Presentations as empty forms
a veil of surface perceptions
is it a smudge around the edges of clear light?
Be careful if you pick it up again.

A world in which 'a someone' is defined,
confined, and who has lost the light of Mind
for fragmented forms as fear makes blind.
Put the weapon down!

Be moved and move from being.
pass by the habit of self.
Let the love play of our shared Will
forget, neglect and cease to expect,
an external will to witness to You.



To one who warned me of the traps of A Course in Miracles

A Course in Miracles seems to be a large book that can be read and perhaps - though not easily - understood. It was not designed to be intellectually understandable or accessible for it addresses the reader at a level behind or beyond such defences and strategies of self will. Yet the attempt to understand new wine in 'old bottles' persists, and yields frustration.


Everything in this world can be used against the sharing of love and thus seem to become a witness to a force or will that is false or evil - but in whose mind is this purpose active?
I celebrate your breaking free of an unquestioning following of the Course in Miracles - for the truth is not 'out there' - excepting that its welcome - (Truth's welcome) - is in our heart.
The Course is not originally intended to be used to set ourselves impossible goals - but to awaken the reader to that they are already doing so - and suffering the conflict and frustration of a split mind. So as to let it go.
The you that you think was misled and needs to protect itself from such danger is not you - but it is a sense of yourself that you have grown from image, thought and judgements. I do not attack this sense of yourself but merely invite you to look at it with me.
In the moments of sanity - you feel the peace and integrity of your being. In the times of self conflictedness you are tempted to seek for certainty amidst confusion - such as to put outside your mind the cause of what is troubling you. Thus conflict is shifted outside and a sense of yourself more oderly and in attempt to unify - is made within. But you will never be whole while it is chosen as your home.

It may well be that the A Course in Miracles book is no longer relevant as a tool or a path for you - but whatever path you do accept as a way of releasing the demand that the world serve your private need above all else - will be one in which you do not use IT to validate or prove you to yourself.
The release of this attempt allows God.
In God is a direct relationship - as Holy Spirit and as the Son or Creation revealed - not to thoughtful understanding but to your heart's knowing in silence.
This relationship is eternal - but in time is a step by step rewakening.
It is not the dream role that awakens.
It is you  - the dreamer who awakens - in the light of a pure awareness that is always present and from which you never can separate except in identifying with images and thoughts - in other words - imaginatively.

This email is a gift to yourself - both the one you sent - and my reply.
The one you sent is an expression of a teaching learning that you are in process of awakening through.
To see our 'self' in action is to shift to the perspective that isn't identified with the role we thought was our self.
This is a 'miracle' in that it doesn't operate within the laws that apply within the dream that we make for ourselves and others of how everything is and how it should be. It suddenly is free of these and opens to a different basis from which to live. Now it will be that whenever you live from this basis, your presence will in essence be a blessing, but it is not at all from any conscious sense of the world needing to be fixed. It is only our mind that has believed in loss of Light and Love and Peace. But this mind is simply wrong - not wrong as in punishable - but mistaken, misguided and missing the point.

The traps are never in the teaching - even if there were false teachings whose intent was to ensnare - the trap would still lie in the mind of the one who is not paying attention - and allows himself or herself to be persuaded of the reality of a form based meaning rather than the meaning of love.

Listen to your heart.
Listen to make sure it is your heart and not the chatter and confusion of your thought.
No one can take this away from you.
Nothing can take this away from you.
But in listening to and acting upon the confusion of our unevaluated thought - we experience ourselves as hurt, limitation and loss, from which arises a reaction of self protection.

The evaluation of our thought is the Holy Spirit - because of ourselves we cannot tell the true from the false - and often get them the wrong way round.
The Holy Spirit can be called anything or nothing - but in emptying yourself of the clutter and falsity of a mind involved only with itself, you will feel or know the stirring of a life that you did not make. It may seem to be thought or feeling or coincidence of event or meaning with persons or world - but it speaks to you and through you.

You are quite right to abandon a fruitless exercise - but the frustration is not the conclusion of the lesson - nor is placing responsibility onto A Course in Miracles a true path to resolving the sense of guilt you feel.

If you want to have opposition, then your will is done.
Because it isn't of God, you will have to do the work to maintain its reality for you - which must replace the awareness of God in your mind while you actively pursue your desire.

I tell you that this is not your true desire.
God must be your true desire.
For God is Truth.
Not excluding the truth of you.

(Postscipt 1)
"Let go and let God"
"Let go and let God Be you"
Yes - and as God is all that is truly be-ing you in this moment it is an allowing of what already Is - to Be (as it Is).
The 'let go' bit is the automatic result of truly seeing the mechanism of control for what it is.
The 'work' or hard part humanly is the willingness to look upon the ego rather than act according to its dictate.
This is like watching thoughts go past rather than becoming involved and distracted by them. Innocent perception can look on what would otherwise trigger fear and guilt and see or discern truth - which does not give rise to guilt or fear, (though our subsequent thinking about it may indeed trigger a blind spot and engage attention in distraction again.
The trap is always that of making an identity for oneself - whether out of spiritual or profane components.
When we experience the results of our false identity, we blame it on (insert scapegoat here).
The conviction that some thing or one or teaching is Truth is very likely if not always going to give rise to idolotry and a false sense of self because our images, symbols and concepts are at best reflections of truth - or Holy Spirit communication towards opening our mind to truth.

(Postscript 2) No ego - no problem?
Yes - when the problem seems to define or limit You - then the self-centric perspective is active.
When willingness re-aligns to truth, then wholeness replaces conflicting desires and the movement of being is expressed as actions or non actions - that bear or behold witness to wholeness.
The ego is quieted by truth as irrelevant. It doesn't matter whose ego it seems to be - if our peace is obscured then we are in a position to become willing to quiet the ego by our disregard. But the way of that is by giving our whole regard to the Living - or that which is revealed to our willingness for truth that we do not make,  can not control, and are totally dependent on.
In light of such a joy - we can discern limitation that before we were blind to but now are becoming responsible for.
We are responsible for what we think - or accept in our minds. But we are never to blame.
To accept the idea of blame is to starve ourselves of love.

(Postscript 3) To an expression of gratitude for this writing.

Yes. We meet in shared purpose and find ourselves in communication.
The ego perspective has a different purpose and 'finds' itself in forms that look like communication and may either seem devoutly following of - or oppose a teaching path of truth.
I felt to tell her she is right - for she cannot be wrong in her being - and I join with her in truth. In this context I offer correction for the error in what she is accepting in her own mind - not at the level of arguing 'teachings' and their 'meanings' - but in addressing to loss of peace and the restoration of sanity.
Because I was not identified with asserting or protecting the truth of A Course in Miracles, I do not need to react as if truth were attacked. How can Truth be attacked? It cannot - but colluding with the false will obscure the truth in our mind.
Though her mail is fearful in blaming teachings as false, there is much in it that is almost being shared with Holy Spirit that needs to come into the light to be undone or made clear. Sometimes we don't know how to ask - or are in a culture where speaking different from the accepted 'truths' is fearfully prohibited. So we only let it out in anger when we leave and slam the door - as a parting shot of self justification amidst a painful or emotional process of change.
This is just such an occasion where a human kindness may serve a greater good than to argue teachings.
I feel that our growing understanding of and awakening to the truth of what life is - and what we are - will from time to time occasion fundamental shifts in our awareness of mind that initiate a desire or need to shut down and back off.
If this becomes active, then panic and 'self survival' trample on and use - anyone and anything to maintain the separate self sense - and this does generate a sense of guilt - or love unworthiness - which is denied or hidden and at least partially offloaded onto God and Brother in such a way that isolates the heart in a private mind and a Lightless world of separation, conflict and density.
All that is needed is calm in which the truth can be felt.
For Truth is not the picture we make in fear - and when we let that realisation in - even as instants or steps of a 'little willingness' - we are awakened at least to a living path in which we can take our next step as a living step in which we grow in trust and our capacity of willingness and love.
It would be unwise to underestimate the capacity of the mind to deceive itself while the seed desire for a special self remains hidden.
My fellow man and woman are often helping me to become aware of - and to own - my hidden desire to be special. It is only when I see it as it is that I can also see that I do not want it. When I see it as the lens of the desire itself would have me see - I believe I do want it.
A Course in Miracles can be made a special relationship; a way to avoid a real relationship that shares from a prior wholeness.
But all such attempts to get for oneself are inherently self defeating - and break down. That's where we either seek and find another candidate for a special relationship (looking outside our self) - or open to truth because it is true.
I am grateful with you.

 in Love's blessing


Time - and the 'celestial speed up'

Our sense of time is a function of consciousness.

Consciousness of time is an activity that is constantly flitting about. Comparing moments, anticipating and recalling future and past. It all happens so fast that we don't notice it is a construct - which has become second nature to us - a sort of default program running..

But our First Nature is not time bound - for the Spark of Eternity is the Light by which our true mind is lit.

The second nature grew out of the desire to judge good and evil. It is false - for it seeks to determine all things for itself without the Intimacy of God in which Truth is simply revealed.

In order to maintain its sense of separation from God, the mind has to deny its own Source and true nature. Not verbally - but by means of imagination, dissociation, distraction and deceit. To maintain this sense of self and world - as a judging and separated mind in a body - requires a constant vigilance in its defence or protection. But the experience is one of depletion and degradation - such as is depicted in the Bible story of the Prodigal Son.

The personal identity of the would-be separating Son inevitably breaks down - or becomes meaningless despite the investment in the meanings by which it is acted out. As it breaks down, Light dawns. The light of Truth.

We experience the Light of Spirit either through our willingness - or through our resistance.

Through resistance we make the experience of fear, in which we become lost and desperate - running ever faster to escape ourselves as we fear ourselves to be. This is 666; the busyness that never opens into to the Seventh Day in which "Behold - and it is very Good". For such Is our Divine function, to see the presence of love and thereby to be the presence of love extending.

Through our willingness we experience the Light as a flowing present - in which all things take their rightful place - not by the act of human thought - but in the allowing of Truth to Be Itself.

The speed up is a sign of awakening. The awakening begins as a willingness to listen, to ask, to accept and to serve.

The last judgement is That which undoes the mind of judgement:
"Behold my Beloved Son, Whom is My delight!"

Think not this is addressed to only Jesus. Jesus Knew the Father in and through the Son - and calls us awaken likewise. But think neither that it is addressed to the self you make apart and in secret. That which Hears is one with our Holy Spirit, held in trust while seeming to squander our inheritance in journeying away from our heart’s true Home.

Be still of engaging conflicted thought and Know.

When time falls away, Eternity stands forth as the Always.

Our thought and language do not reach beyond our limiting and limited belief and perception.

But God's Language is Creation Infinite and Universal - and His Intimate Inclusion has not been broken, despoiled or at all changed by the mind of forgetfulness and fear. But such a will must be recognised as what it is - and laid aside - or you will use it and believe all that it tells you.

Jesus shows the way. Not in being sacrificed by God or by others - but in freely following the Holy Spirit's Direction; the Voice for God - found in the heart by going within in trust.

The fruits of the Spirit are the Gift of God. "Behold I make all things new!"
This is the undoing of time and death.

Now seems to almost disappear in a seamless and linear timeline of experiences in the world.
Yet now expands to become the edgeless Movement of the very Mind of God in the acceptance of God as First and Only.

What does this mean but that we make our own mind up in self image and defend it against truth by giving it priority? It is time to wake up to this and stop.

All are called, but few choose to listen. But all are called and all will choose to listen.
For none can abide or withstand the truth - and we shall be undone of self-illusion.
The Spirit of God is One.  And his Thoughts are Like Him in kind and in nature.

This might seem to condemn the divided mind - but that is yet another thought of judgement and thus further deceit.

Judge not - stop using the mind to divide and rule. It cuts you from your true Life - which waits your welcome where you left it.

Let the mind that was in Christ Jesus - the Holy Spirit - be your discernment.

Be the willingness that gives welcome - and keeps not resistance hidden as protection of sin. But let it be known as it is and thus be seen truly - and healed.

These things are coming to pass within the mind that yet sleeps and remembers not.
But look not to another time or a time soon. Look to the now of time - and let your willingness find you in the nick of time.

For joy and love shared - in peace -  Is your salvation.

The mind may seem to stray and forget. But it is to the Living Truth in You that He says "Go in peace and sin no more".

Go with your Holy Spirit and without the thoughts of confusion and conflict. For such is the way of peace

Look to where you set your treasure - for by this choice do you set all else true or false.

In Peace


2010-07-18 The dream

I commented on a question about interpreting a dream in which someone was being given hair extensions...

Trying to make sense of a dream may simply be a way of continuing in the extension of meaningless fantasy.
In other words there may be nothing to understand - as waking up reveals it to be unreal and insignificant.

When the Spirit speaks through a dream to bring attention present for a specific meaning to be accepted or acknowledged, the communication arises from within and may not even need to be thought on - but can be simply felt as blessing at a level that is peace in the heart.

Cutting off the hair can symbolize a release of the world and its lure of illusory powers to become a something in our own right. Hair extensions can be fun to dress up in - but if we get our sense of self validation from our appearance and from the response that we get from others - - we become trapped in a hollow mask.

Look at thoughts and see how much junk floats around.
It has been called the astral or lower astral plane. In rising beyond the gravity of a false and fixed interpretation, this is one of the first kinds of thought or 'experience' to pass by without getting involved with it.

It is also true that some make a path from dream interpretation as a window to the mind and the Spirit.  Dreams become a realm of communicating at a level prior to the surface aspects of the daily experience of life - which can engage attention so as to neglect the depth of our being.

There are many aspects of dreaming that apply to our so called waking state. The phrase ‘awakening’ means enlightenment - but also implies that the story of our experience - that we tend to take as reality - is a cover over - or distraction from - the reality that knows itself as it is.

The Holy Spirit is the Universal Teacher of Truth - through all or any agencies - because ultimately it is your own and only true mind. It’s vision and guidance is the reinterpretation of dreams - which are themselves already 'interpretations' made of images, thoughts and associations. If our identity is bound up in a lack of wholeness whose sense of lack is reinforced by interpreting from that presumption, then Holy Spirit will reinterpret so as to restore wholeness to our awareness.

Whichever paths we take, Holy Spirit Life will work with us and through us. The key is the desire and willingness to listen ongoingly - as our way of life. The paths that are not feeling and listening are no life at all and THAT is a correct understanding of the dream - for it has only the life that you, as dreamer, give it.

Your peace is you understanding - because your peace is beyond all understanding.
Understanding rests or stands under the knowing in quiet.
The attempt to understand outside of the flow of already communication - as a wilful demand - is like stirring the mud in a pool. All sorts of mud and detritus swirls around and seem to suggest all sorts of meanings relative to the original impulse - which persists as the stirring, by giving attention to and identification with - the stirred up stuff.
Yet in pausing, the mud settles of itself, the clarity restored of itself, and the realisation and responsibility of mind for its own inclusive wholeness - dawns - of itself.

In Peace



Freedom, identity and healing

The ego aspect wants to be free of limitations in order to do otherwise impossible things.

The love that you are wants to be free of limitation in order to be all that it is - regardless of the doings that that might or might not give rise to.

To abide and hold with all that you are - and to trust and follow the Direction of your own love seems an Impossibility in terms of the world and all of what its teaching and learning has facilitated. And it is this 'doing' that is asked of each of us as the welcome and faith in the Living Word in our Heart.

In the living out of this in our lives, we seem often to pass through drama, messy involvements, fears and struggles against adversity. Yet in all honesty awake one can truly say that God - or Love - did all the work and all I did was to somehow (by grace!) keep the way and the channel open.

To shut down our heart is to crucify ourselves. And our body and world will faithfully reflect our thought and intent in our experience. To keep our heart open is in effect to give it back to its Source.

In the world the Heart is hidden and therefore secret.

In God it is the other way around.

To bring the world back into alignment with God is to forgive and release the desire for a secret self - and let Peace restore a wholly guiltless mind.

The pain of longing is an unrecognised Communion - seen through the frame of its apparent loss. Zeal must be tempered with humility, or we proceed as if we know - based on certainties that would not hold without being forcefully maintained.

The problem is the answer unrecognised. But the problem also 'solves itself' in the world by presenting itself as it is not - (dissociation). To be guided from the decoys and distractions - in honesty - to the truth of the problem - will uncover the truth. And the answer will become obvious once the problem is no longer hidden.

Our sense of separation from Self - from Life - from Love - From God - is more terrible than mere words could ever convey. It is our death ... But look again - with desire to see truly - as the heart bids you in all sanity to allow.

The mind that thinks it can leave or deny the heart is itself but a thought. Pick it up and see all Oneness seem to fragment and collapse upon itself. Be turned to allow love's Movement and see all fragmentation and conflicting identity dissolve.

Temptation, self-will and release

We may not recognize temptation as what it is - but take it to be the voice of our own heart and mind - when it is but thoughts of spiritual death - presented as desire for a self projection and protection.

In Gethsemene, Jesus found this desire for a separate will was still active in him when he had thought to have relinquished it entirely - for he found his peace upset when his disciples could not watch and pray with him. he recognized this experience as witness to his own self-will and immediately returned tothe Father to offer it up.

And dis likewise yet again - until his peace was witness to the truth of one Will.

Our self-based experience - which is our ‘take’ or interpretation of our nowness - is our self and our world - both. It is of the nature of a duality.

But it is not Truth - for we can experience unlike Truth, through the use of judgement, imagination, wishful thinking and desire. I can experience myself as I am not - and suffer as if it were true.

Without Truth's perspective - we could not know our self made illusion was unreal - for it would be all in all to us.

But behind (and before) the dreaming of the self in a world made flesh - is the Peace and Presence of Truth that is your direct and living Eternality. Its Light is one with the light of your own awareness, and its awakening and remembrance is the transformation of a dream of a life in fear and darkness, to a communioned life in joy and trust.

An image that came to me that speaks of the falsely identified self  - is of turtle island. Where 'we' live out our life stories on a world that seem solid  - until the turtle moves. Excepting the Being-ness of God - is not an Alien Will that 'nothings' us - but is the Source and Truth of All that we Truly are - even within our self projecting desire.

The self-desire is a seeming contra-movement to the Self Extending Inclusion. And from its standpoint - we think, and act out from a Thought "I" -  and we experience ourselves body exclusively - which is to say we forget the Mother/Father - the Allness and Nowness of Direct Being.

Instead we have a fragmented experience of now - defined and separated wilfully - yet experienced as if the world does it to us.

The release of the self-will - (Which is the corollory of the acceptance of a life in love and service to Life Itself) - necessarily involves the recognition of the thought-desire for what it truly is - and its release.

Our nowness is an always on, feedback device. If it speaks of limitation - then there are currently limiting thoughts affecting our interpretation or appreciation of reality.

Now Jesus was apparently 'limited' with and by extreme conditions of unlove, the acting out of denial upon the body. But his nowness was of the Father. When false questioning was applied to him - he answered Not - but remained at one in peace of the Truth of a Wholly Loving God.

How so - but by the Love of the Father Who Knows His Son as He Is.

And not as the Son can imagine himself to be; in opposition or competition with any aspect of himself.

So the release of the self-will is an always already-now response to the substitute nowness that we take to be living in the world as limited power.
And is the automatic result of not hiding or disguising seperation thoughts in the dark - but of allowing them to be revealed in Light - as they are.

Paul (of Tarsus) fought against self-will and therefore identified with it as real. This is not a cause fro blame but a cause to stop, look and listen anew. There can seem to be an Enemy to God, to Life and to Love. And the temptation to see this outside ourselves is a most fundamental - but misguided - self protection.

That such an evil will is our own self surely demands that it be obliterated, damned - put out! - says confusion.

Be still and listen Only for Truth's Guidance. Suffer not to react on the basis of confusion but wait on the Spirit of the One God, whose signs and fruits are known in secret - in the Heart - that the world knows not.

To take one step in Guidance, is to allow alignment with God now. And the experience will of itself reflect the true alignment. But the attention is in the trust and light of the restored Communion and not in the world of form.

The temptation to see in terms of form is the forgetting of Purpose - whose forms always serve Meaning and not a multiverse of made up meanings.


The Now of you be-ing

Your 'Now' is the feedback to your desire.

If in this Now, your desire is single, whole and pure, you will ONLY know all things through the Spirit that Moves you.

If you find a split mind then that will give you a polarized experience of a conflicted nature.

The only whole desire is love and love is always already awake.

For it knows all things within itself.

False desires are of a love of power, that sees all things without itself and outside itself. For in wanting power for oneself alone creates a sense of lack and separateness from all.

It seeks to dispossess itself of truth, that it may possess its fantasy.

The way of awakening reverses the way of reversal - but by releasing, undoing and acceptance - and not by asserting further self will.

Service is the release of self will. Serve love by bringing attention present for something not of your making and not of your will.

The answer is where the problem is - or it would not be the answer. Do not use the promise of an answer to shortcut the opening of your mind to the feedback of your now - or you wait forever un receiving.

The arena of helplessness, inadequacy, need and incapacity - is the condition in which you bring the Divine forth by your single unequivocal call.

You do not need to seek such opportunity. They will be brought to you in context of your embracing life and discovering the blocks to love’s awareness.

In your communion with God, let there be no one outside, as someone or something else to use as distraction or protection from the love of your very being. To desire to save or serve others outside the love is to desire to usurp love of its home in you and through you.

Everyone is serving your awakening because they were judged or interpreted by you to serve a dream of self creation, and awakening rises when the self-creating is no longer forced upon your Now. Everyone is part of your awakening when they are no longer used for sin, for you have released your demand that they serve your will, let them be as they are, and appreciated them as they are.

But your Now does not leave you when you seem to have made it yours alone and lose your self in time.

It is disguised so as to be irrelevant to the distraction that has your fixated attention.

Wake up to what the mind makes for itself by deception and self image.

The desecration of the heart from the apparent attack on innocence is associated with a deeply intimate horror; guilt. But the companioned and communioned mind does not use this to mount further attack on itself.

For it has given its faith to the desire and welcome of peace and healing above all else.

To rest in truth accepted.

in Gratitude


The controverse is not the Universe

Controversy is an invitation to a spectacle in the arena of conflict - as if the outcome can boost or diminish the validity of you.

Look within and let the assertive will subside in the depth of Silence.

The symbol that is given me for this is to kneel in the Heart.

But the symbol is only a symbol - kneeling is the giving of acknowledgement, or due worth.

Giving is the way of receiving.

Give what is God's to God.

Holy wars are simply wars that use life symbols taken out of context.

Use awakened faith to question and move beyond belief based religion into the quickening of Spirit.

Make and worship not images of the Living Reality and you will be held in the Source as one with its Current Expression.

Do you live or do you dream of life?

The seeker of truth is not Awake - or he would not seek.

He is not identifying with life directly - but mythologically. Does he or did he ever really exist in the terms that he presumes to be his self? - No - but belief and identification are really given to the images, definitions and ideas.

Truth is not subject to opinions, theories, philosophical ideas or concepts - that can be woven to clothe insight or to simply express wishful thinking - and taken as if they had potency in themselves. They have only  - but not less than - all power given them by belief and desire.

Holy Spirit uses the contents of your mind to awaken you to that you Are Mind. None of the contents are in themselves truth - though they can be sorted and purified by the Holy Spirit to reflect and serve truth.
As Mind - you are not independent, nor differentiated exclusively. You could say you were in a state of radiant openness that has not collapsed into an identification of form. This does not cease to be so when your attention does become distracted by desire, differentiation and form.

But trying to talk this into realisation is absurd because the talking mind wants to understand everything in its terms. To engage in talking as if we could define and determine truth is to persist in blocking the movement of truth from our own awareness.

The primary desire of the truth moving in us and as us is to "Know Thy Self".

That is why we "do nothing" and let God.

If all that you think you are seems to compel your attention to collapse or withdraw 'self protectively' - you may find that "doing nothing" is the faith and willingness whose practice burns out the identification patterns of a private will.

Spirit is in you as you in Spirit

The Spirit of God - as Indwelling Holy Spirit, walks with everyone - no matter who or what they seem to have become, do or say. But the mind in self-illusion may not recognise the true nature of its Guide and Companion through the events, lessons and meetings that lead it from its locked in self-regard, to the love-light of a direct and pure awareness.

The opening of the mind to light takes individualized forms for individual lifelines, where some paths serve some but would be unhelpful to others. It is not helpful to seek and find error in others and then use that to validate the truth or rightness of one's own path.

It is helpful to extend the truth through willing service or love of Self in all.


Does evil exist?

Theological and philosophical questions are often asked about the Universe, Life, God or Creation, but what about if we ask this question only of our self presently?

Is there an oppositional force to our life or being?

I'm not interested in right or wrong answers - but just to invite the question and listen.

There can certainly seem to be such a sense of conflicted forces - that are the motions or intent of conflicting desires.

Some teach that there are bad thoughts and that they originate from or are embodiment of a devil, or fallen angel. Though this teaching may not be overtly subscribed to, its conditioning runs deep.

A part of God splits off and fights Him in order to replace or usurp God?

God is limited by opposition and therefore is not God - but a part of a cosmic conflict of two powers - forever embraced in struggle for domination?

But the Spirit of God is One - and so is His Son.

But our personal human perspective seems to see evil motive and intent in others - and does not want to discover it in ourselves - so this is fearfully minimised and swept under the carpet.

Bad thoughts - that actually are mean spirited, hateful and actively undermining of wellbeing, present themselves as in some way self serving - and yet suggest a sense of self that is lacking, guilty, inadequate and unjustly victim.

If we act on the basis of these thoughts and therefore accept our sense of self as suggested - we feed a habit that destroys our peace - and all that in peace is shared. And grow the density and compulsion of the 'voices' that 'protect and justify' or at least mitigate or salve our conflicted and painful sense of self.

A painful and conflicted self that we do not realize or recognise - because we displace and deny so as to not feel and know pain of fear and guilt directly. We use our brothers and our world and our body as the scapegoat - and put our guilt outside and hate it.

But having 'put our mind outside' we now fear it's 'return'.

Its as if an evil force is trying to penetrate my defences - some nameless and terrible mind that I fear to look within and see. So I draw my fences tighter - and use anything to keep my attention from the possibility of knowing what will surely damn me.

There is a war on and everyone and everything has been requisitioned to support me in my struggle.

If I can normalize everything and get it all to flow along nicely - I can adapt and accept a tiny life where for a while I can forget what I am running from - have defensiveness automatically deal with problems before they arise as well as as they are arising. And can make a life in which I can believe for a while that I am as I think and the world is as I think it - and yet hardly have any attention free enough to notice any but the most superficial of thoughts.

Is self deception evil?

Jesus said "Resist ye not evil"

But he was demonstrably active in embracing Good - yet not a good opposed to evil - but the Good that is the Will of God our One Spirit, and the appreciation and service of the Good in all.

He feared not evil though he did recognise temptation as deception.

I long had a sense that many seemingly religious people I met were in fact worshippers of evil - for that was their underlying conviction - and their faith was a shield and a weapon against what they feared and yet accepted as true and powerful - And hoping for a magical or otherworldly Force for Good to intervene on their hapless  sin condemned plight.

And to these there must needs be a devil - for to side against the devil is surely to be seen to stand among the righteous?

It matters little that the  shadows shift and change from one evil to another foe to yet another sign of impending doom - just as long as the mind is maintained in its presentation.


Christian hearsay - taint so!

I read the following Article: (see links for origins)

The essence of the Christian religion

“The essence of the Christian religion consists in the reality that
the creation of the Father,
by sin,
is restored
in the death of the Son of God,
and re-created
by the grace of the Holy Spirit
into a kingdom of God.”
Herman Bavinck, Reformed Dogmatics, 1:61.

My Commentary:

(Slightly edited from what I posted).

This guilt-logic of death as a price or sacrifice as payment, has never made sense – not has it ever extended the Sense that Is the Holy Spirit.

The mind of sin is simply the mind or intent to have ‘my will and not Thy Will be done’. 

While such is identified with and ‘loved’ – it costs the appreciation of Life Eternal – and therefore brings the wage of ‘death’ WHILE it is engaged. Dramas and apparent conflicts ABOUT this mentality are simply subtle strategy to persist in employing it – in place of aligning with Living Truth. Such activity is,in effect is “all about me”. But it is a false sense of self and so can only result in deception.

Thirst for Truth does not depend on a magical ‘Jesus’ – but on likewise freely laying down the personal will in acceptance and trust of Only the Father’s Will. The Father’s Will is the Movement of Being discovered in stillness of self-creating thought and judgement. It Is Truly Present - while our attention is wilfully yet ignorantly distracted from Living presence.

The Holy Spirit is the Intelligence and Voice and Guide to the Son of God in forgetfulness of His Father. Ask and it shall be Given. Seek and you shall find. If the fruits are not of God’s Wholeness – then ask yourself what am I asking and where am I seeking for answers?

To kneel in the heart to the Christ is to acknowledge the First and accept right relationship as Second, like unto the first but the son or extension of – and not a power or self in its own right.

It is through the apparent death of the ‘son of Adam’ – that awakened love knows itself anew and in holiness. For it is by assuming the mind or power of judgement that the appreciation of the Father's Light in All That Is, is usurped, and instead is experienced a self and world that testifies to an orphaned will. Such is the power of your faith - given to judgement, division, war and death.

The forms this takes vary for each of us but the meaning is universal. The Cross symbolizes this – as does the Resurrection awaken and rise beyond symbols – but the mind in sin will not see holiness excepting ‘outside itself’, in some other world or from some god of ‘otherness’. The desire for the Light is the dawning of the Light – but seen externally. Such was John the Baptist.

Clearly the mind in sin cannot ‘live’and see God. You must be Spoken For through your willingness to love as God Loves.
Man cannot ‘do’ this. A laying down of the ‘doing’ is the fruit of the prayer of the heart; “Show me, that I may follow in the way WITH You”.

“With You” is not a life alone, nor a contracted arrangement of separated selves. It is the Living Love that receives as it gives and gives as it receives.

It seems we can receive evil and suffer ill. This must be challenged in our own mind, perception and thought – or we succumb to the dissonance of sin as if it were creator of our being – instead of recognising it as feedback to prompt Awakening of the heart’s discernment. Watch and Pray.

Be aware – by the Light that Is Given you – and abide in the heart that recognises Light. Insanity is a veil upon True Sight. By giving attention and therefore value, to the Holy Spirit within, the mind possessed of its own thought is disregarded, passed by, put behind.
A New Earth rises from the restoration of the alignment of what before was called inner and outer. The Second Coming is the awakening of the Christ through humanity – and is near – not in time and space – but nearer – where the double vision always overlooks.

The essence of Religion is restoration of the human to the Divine. It matters not the forms – excepting they serve Purpose. God is the Supreme Identity – but not an image or concept of God. Man in ignorance and sin seeks identity in religion as in everything – yet cannot find his home excepting he remembers his Source.

in Gratitude

PS - I felt a beauty of truth in the article to which I responded - and my response is a joining with this to let the beauty be free of the cage of guilt. For 'the death of the Son of God' is an oxymoronic contradiction that needs to be undone. You could say Jesus's acceptance of Our Father's Will is the undoing of death. My part in accepting God is the removal of the conditions and blocks that I have erected and maintained in ignorance and confusion.
Free will is to be freely and willingly given back to the truth.
This is not a sacrifice - though we may deeply fear it so. The Holy Spirit is the Guide. When fear usurps true guidance we see all things awry. And suffer our exclusion.


New New Testament - fulfils yet transcends. Revelatory. Gentle

"The Holy Spirit's Interpretation of the New Testament", A Course in Understanding and Acceptance. (often referred to as 'NTI')

More info: http://www.forholyspirit.org

Is it possible to be looking in the world at a book or text and find it speaks your heart's light - talking to you through a book - while simultaneously recognising this is your own voice?

Such is my appreciation for this book.

If I step back a little I can say that such truth as I find opening with this book, has the capacity to calm, restore and awaken me to an altogether present perspective.

I find it truly revelatory at a level the intellect cannot reach. Yet the book is an intimate conversation with you that holds the reader in deepest reverence. It could not be more gentle or honouring of the truth of all.

The story of Jesus, his teaching and demonstration, may be disputed by the world - but its coming into our mind carries more than any religion can own when its truth begins to speak directly to our own life.

When we are willing to open to a true understanding, we put our own judgement aside and listen in true desire of life. We are led by the movement of Spirit within to recognise and release the mentality by which we have deceived ourselves and lost our soul as we gained a world. And by this we are restored to what we thought lost.

Many will experience resistance to some of what this book reveals - but also many will come to a deep and abiding gratitude for being gently and clearly guided through it!

I find nothing coercive here, no sales pitch, and no judgement against or condemnation of. It is as direct and profound as human language can be - yet it is as nothing outside of a willingness for and love of truth. You cannot be made to drink!

That this book has appeared is surely witness to a hunger and readiness for truth.
But don't put the value or authority onto the book - but be the extension of that which is in your heart revealed.

There is much that Jesus shared that could not be received then by minds fitted only to the terms the world sets. I feel this book opens this anew in terms that can speak to anyone from any background.

What might this book bring in terms of you and your life?
A revealed basis - that is opened within You - for peace, joy and freedom in capacity to share love as the basis of life.

Does such enlightenment come from a book - No!
It comes because in some way you are ready to accept.

The Holy Spirit authorship can be an issue for some who either dont believe in divine guidance or others who cant believe such grace could actually have anything directly to do with themselves and all others.
If you read the various books within you will find different voices - yet one purpose.

If you share this purpose you will find yourself as you do not expect - for awakening is prior to the mind we engage in the world - and by which we are ignorant of truth.
There is a grace that reveals what is always true, to a mind that believes it has lost its original nature, one step at a time, as you are willing to accept

(I posted this as an Amazon uk review soon after the book was published)


Blocks and barriers and practising innocent perception

When we put our faith in the world - and the things of the world, we are engaging our self in the world and find an experience of death - for the world is temporal, not eternal. Our desire for life becomes subverted to trying to make the impossible, true. For the self that is found in the world is not true - and no matter how much you may desire what you think it brings - it is not you.

The notion that the truth of any thing or any one is to be framed within and by the sense of self grown in the world is a block.

The innocent question - that is no attempt to get the answer that suits 'you', that is no strategy of self advantage and has no agenda of solving the past or its burdens - is the movement of True Desire - NOTICED and ALLOWED.

This Movement is subtle and easily drowned out by the activity of mind relating to the world - to the thoughts and meanings of the world. Therefore become calm that what is already here can draw your attention to WHAT IS ALIVE HERE.

The Movement - the True prayer of the heart - is the direct expression of the Love that is Eternal - in You. In Being You - is an Invitation to release that which is not you - and come back or be restored to the Allness of you - without judgement and without the effects of judgement.

Because what you make is yours - your judgement is not taken away while you want it. When seen truly, you do not want it. Because you believe it gives you the life that you have in the world, you yet cling to it as your life - but in willingness to practice the Holy Instant you are led to discover that the self-thoughts are deception and do not speak for You - and so you become willing to put your experience aside and Listen to Me.

The Light is the Conscious Beholding of Love. It is spacious in awareness. It is alive to itself in everything. The self-thoughts that arise from judgement are the denial of Light. That is there purpose and that is why you wanted them - to think and experience a private creation - to freeze 'life' and use it for your own imagined reflected self purposes.

But to 'live' outside the Light is to lose Life, and all that is Alive.
Yet to the fragmented little sense of life amidst death, does it not seem that the Light will immediately cause you to abandon the identity you have found in this world - and lose your life? And is this fear-belief not a block to the opening truth?

A split heart and mind must be healed so that you do not serve two masters; each undermining the other. There is no healing without a falling away of the blocks - and the blocks are a faulty attempt at security amidst confusion arising from wanting what you do not want.

The path without a heart is false and can yield only bitterness and loss. Yet your heart is Given You in every Movement and Prompt of Your Being's Love for You - as you Are.

To take the path with a heart is to accept and live from your willingness.
Not a an applied 'willingness' of zeal or achievement in which your self idea is validated so as to 'save' you from a sense of injustice or ignominy. But a moment by moment willingness to let Life Live - and to fit in rather than attempt to fit Life to your own constructs.

This is a step by step process - yet in each step you are listening and trusting instead of asserting and fighting.

Blessed are the meek - for they shall inherit the Earth.
To abide in Me is to accept and share all things in My Sight.
The world you thought was outside You is beheld anew and with loving recognition.

Let yourself be guided in what you can not control.
This is to say let yourself be free of the belief that you - of yourself - need control.

Be curious as to the nature and truth of that which seems to block.
There is always another way of looking at this.

It is not required that you see the body not - but only that you desire more to see in Light.

As you ask - so shall you receive.

In Peace



Disobedience is called for - Honest to God

I cant nor need I argue with what anyone else finds helpful - but I discern persuasion as a force that seeks to manipulate - and see it finds a passive obedience to the presentation of authority of the persuader.

The desire to be led by any externally derived Guide is simply the state of any mind that as yet refuses or fears to look within. Yet in the desire to be truly guided even so - we will 'find and be found' by agencies for the Holy Spirit's guidance or Teacher Within - so as to loosen and sort the 'evil' or meaningless thoughts by which we block the capacity to feel, hear, recognise, love and extend our Holy Spirit - God's Gift of the Spirit of One.

When a Son or Daughter of God forgets his or her nature as the Extension of God - it is because that function is usurped by a 'mind that believes it knows' - and yet is not at rest, at one and sharing in the fruits of the Spirit.

Where we look and find guidance, value and meaning is where we choose to put our faith. If we put our faith in the world, we are looking at best at the reflections of the eternal truth - that is not contained in its reflection - but is the Holy Spirit Beholding and Recognition of God. More often we are seeing but symbols of the meanings we have made up in fighting a senseless battle that merely reflects a confused and divided or split mind.

Because this conflict is felt and its basis believed unconsciously or only somewhat consciously - the mind and desire of manipulation is automatically, implicitly and insidiously usurping true Authority. But it always makes its claim to meaning - and indeed righteousness - by deriving its meaning from what it is against.

It is the presumption of enmity, hostility, treachery - in effect - of an evil will. It 'sees' this will in others - in nature - and as seeking to undermine or corrupt its own mind, health or society.

It attempts to use truth to fight war. To dominate, to prevail. This is exactly how to make illusion usurp truth in our mind.

You cannot be disobedient to God - but are under illusion.
Illusion is a false or faulty formulation of reality - and if it is to be seen for what it is - rather than as what it seems to be - we must disobey the mind of guilt - by not acting from its premise. By not acting until we have awakened to or felt the Movement of wholeness and guiltlessness of the Presence of Life. And then allowing and trusting that Movement as the revealer of our true will or desire - for so it is.

To become still of self is to repent and release the mind that would make the world in its own image - and open to innocent perception.
Yet the mind of self-will and its attendant guilt are deeply habituated identifications that - until we become responsible for our own mind - can simply activate a false sense of self by which love’s presence is replaced, covered over, substituted for - and the substitute accepted as if real.

When the pervasive nature of the false self is realized to be filtering and distorting everything - there is either the collapse into a willing death of obedience to its dictates - or-  a disobedience that challenges the seemingly unchallengable - with the innocence and simplicity of a child.

This 'child' is your Divinity - held in trust - awaiting your welcome.
It does not speak from the presumption of evil - but out of the peace of an innocent and single desire; the love of truth; the truth of love.

It is not for us to understand how we can 'overcome' or pass beyond the dictates of a false limitation. But only to give welcome to what is given us to desire - from God - from the inherency of our nature as unified Being.

Obedience to God is not really a matter of choice - but a matter of honesty. While it seems a matter of choice, you will feel guilty for ‘your mind’ that seems to want a selfish love - and gets a hate-love self and world in return.

This is because the mind is actively engaging in the attempt to make the unreal, real.
But in an active desire and willingness for truth to reign in your heart - you will see honestly, because you will not be engaging such a wish.

The resistance to truth must not be invested with personhood, enemy powers or stories that set you apart from your own love. Or your stories will become as your reality by your own faith.

The mind of persuasion must be disobeyed in every moment of remembering and recognition that suddenly illumines desire - thirst - for truth - amidst the illusions of choices that suggest and maintain a sense of you as 'in between'. There is nothing in between you and your Self, but an act by which are deceived in thought.

Where we look and find guidance, value and meaning is where we choose to put our faith. This simply needs to be brought to an honesty - without judgement or condemnation.
Illusion says "follow me and become free".
Truth shows you - "you are already free".

Travel the way you desire to arrive and enjoy. For we are always 'arriving in' what we have defined as our joy. To recognise a faulty choice is a happy release of the unwanted. We always know peace in choosing to let the Voice for Truth guide us.

In Peace



Open hell and discover hell-o!

If concept-ion based perception is your will, you must believe that you alone are a doer, that you alone are a power - and that you are alone.

So in the ego life there is the linear story or commentary that 'sees' clocking in, climbing stairs, parking the car, putting trash in the can, as if they were mechanical processes in a mechanical world. It doesn't really see - because it believes it already knows - and that there is nothing of value to be seen except in its ‘special loves’ - or to be avoided in its ‘special hates’. It is intent on getting something done or getting to a destination of some other moment, some other place - but 666 - never a seventh day rest in which to behold the Glory and the Good that is the music, poetry and art of being. Hell is a walled off state of exclusion. A frozen heart under a tormented mind.

Open hell and discover hell-o!

Life is not dead mechanism.

You do not have to look to the dead thought (concept-idol) for meaning.

You are moved by the grace and flow of being - and can know this - in any instant where you recognise the Spirit instead of focussing on the forms and the meanings you have endowed them.

For many years I have signed my cheques 'gladly' where conventionally folks write 'only'.  Good money is God money - because in its exchange God is acknowledged and remembered.

Possession possesses. Giving gifts. Receiving honours. Getting loses.

As a musician and dancer, I am aware of how dead are most humans to their body as an instrument of love's expression. How the truth is replaced with mechanical productions and hyped presentations that take the forms of Life's expression and use them to kill the Life - and so 'have' the dark in which to hide and seek for dark 'pleasures'- that are but pain disguised in false promises.

Death is not the transitional refocussing of attention whereby the body is released of an impossible burden. It is the thing we humanly tend to call life - and defend against Life by dying to unconsciousness. Desiring to Not Know - by asserting our will - our desire - to make reality serve our self-god.

T 31 F 5. You who believe that you can choose to see the Son of God
as you would have him be, forget not that no CONCEPT of yourself
will stand against the truth of what you are. (A Course in Miracles)

Nothing real is threatened.

Nothing unreal exists

In gratitude for your company



Seeing self-illusion opens the mind to truth

In any instant that any mind opens to and accepts truth - the force of identification with self illusion is weakened and the awakening is strengthened. I see this as going on in all ways and always - and through whatever agencies serve maximally. But truth has absolutely nothing to do with any conceptual or symbolic truths that we might associate with it and identify with.

As I recognise and accept that awakening is the most important 'work' or purpose to which I can bring to attention in active desire, I am brought to notice more and more of the ways in which I actively maintain the ego mentality - for apart from such allegiance from me, it has no life of its own. I also find these are 'shared' collusions and I practice not joining in the 'mind that limits' in the moment of awareness.

The form in which that takes does not ultimately matter. It may seem to be doing nothing. It may seem to be challenging accepted modes of behaviour and thought - and thus interpreted fearfully by that which identifies exclusively with form. All I know is that if I do not act in line with the guidance for truth - I lose the awareness and appreciation of communion - period.

This doesn't make me infallible in any way - it simply means I am exercising trust as a disciple of truth - and in willingness to learn. It is for each of us to listen in our heart - where we have a direct relationship with God that no one and nothing can ever substitute for.

The Second Coming is not only coming - it is coming through now. In a sense this is the inherent truth of every miracle and all the work of the Awakening since first the mind seemed to split from itself. But in a specific sense to our times is an urgency of the call to awaken - not merely to ideas and teachings and understandings - but to recognise in truth that we 'split' our mind to serve wishful thinking and then hide in darkness and confusion. This is the act by which we 'live' a seeming separate struggling existence.

The 'life' that the ego-sense dictates - is tragically pathetic - barely a trickle of Life allowed or shared.

Communication and trust are of the same root - for without trust communication is simply a battle of private wills - and without communication, trust remains a potential unmanifest and without tangibility.

When we think we know - we do not stop and listen. We can ride roughshod over the delicate first steps of the desire to know and be known - simply because we interpret through a sacrosanct set of understandings that we blindly presume true.

I have noticed this in myself many times - and see that spiritual blindness is part of the territory to be undone - just as is any other self-concept that substitutes for love's Presence Shared.

All things serve the purpose of awakening - if that is our active desire.
When it is accepted as our only desire, truth's awakening will be the simply obvious.

But the force and habit of identification with the ego is not of a kind that can be recognised and undone without Divine, Awakened, Help. For what seems obvious to the ego perspective is delusional - and for love's Teacher to find any welcome or attention free for awakening is the gift of love's acknowledgement that we give by receiving.

Giving and receiving is the way our true will IS done.
But when we seek to get or give to get - there is no real gift. Where nothing real is shared, unreality can seem to be anything - and shift at anytime. There is no basis for trust within the getting mind.

To open trust we must lay down or weapons and shields in desire for knowing truth.