A waking into Awakening

I woke today with a pervasive sense of yeuch! - a sense of something wrong - something unaligned - discordant. I didn't trust the thoughts and sense of self that associated with it as a basis to act from, so I rested from acting and abided as willingness for discovery or revelation of 'Life' before thought; for an appreciation and recognition that gracefully is found whenever I rest the mind.

My partner and lover in life and in Spirit loves  - and the loving is an undefendedness - a receptivity that embraces in freedom. Such a love reflected the place that my own sense of yeuch had 'covered over' and allowed the light to rise that doesn't really come or go - but which my habits of thought and desire obscure from time to time. What is the nature of the light? Let it speak its own to its own - but in this little box I will type 'conscious gratitude'. How deep is gratitude? - why it has no bottom.

I cannot speak of the heart of God but that the head trips into itself. But in gratitude I can write as the flow discovers - and trust that between the lines is the space that vibrates Alive.

I am glad for your company - grateful for your company. All of the teachings are nonsense - but in the love that keeps nothing for itself all is aligned to unified purpose - that truth knows Itself.

In such a light, is nowhere a thought of I - or other - identified In exclusion or guilt. Yes the thinking mind seems to 'try' to get back in - but that is residual desire for experience on terms of me being special; to possess or create my experience. So as I notice the discord, or the desire to be special or the symptoms of conflictedness - I stop to discover the original awareness in unconflicted inclusive experience that is being all that is - right where I thought I was as I thought I was.

Do I want to let truth be All That Is - as it is? Well in truth - yes, this is the desire of the heart - and the only peace to be truly shared. The voice of thinking suggests all sorts of variations upon a theme that in one way of another get me to think some more - if I listen and validate them. This would be ok except the habit runs deep in me to identify with discord as self or other guilt, rather than as an alarm that reminds me unreality is in play.

The grace of noticing is a 'rising' of truth from beneath the attention that expresses a sense of I.

I love you. Even in the realms of I and you. Such is the confession that rises and overflows in the expression of truth.

If I still have to think - then let thought serve the heart.
If I still have to think apart - let the noticing serve the heart.

The welcome we give ourselves undoes the rejection we believed active and effective in our experience. The aligned self, expressing unified being, extends welcome to its own.

Thankyou for your welcome.

In Love's blessing
Brian