2016/04/05

If I was... then I'd be...

"If I Was In Better Shape, I'd Be More Confident"




I confess I saw the title of this youtube video promotion, took in a few comments of it and apart from some random dips, did not go into the whole video.

Whenever I am in touch with the true basis for self-trust, there isn't even self-consciousness of lack of 'confidence' nor of using the 'shape I'm in' as a judgement of worth.

Invalidating thinking undermines a natural capacity of receptivity and response as the idea of invalid-ity. And while I am believing such judgements as true of me - including the societal environment of judgements that tap into my own, I have to at least work with that as part of recognizing I am doing that - and what I get out of it and why.

Lack of true self-acceptance is masked of persona that then seeks external validation in substitution for what it does not accept for itself.There are reasons in our conditioning that set us in the patterns we have as part of strategies of adapting to a society that felt UN-loving, and UN-trustworthy - and there are deeper perspectives in that original imprinting that are available in revisiting it that were not available then.

Seeking for something from an unconscious belief that you lack it - can seem to become all sorts of things but cannot exceed its starting place. You can only rest in who you feel and know yourself to be - not in anything you are trying to be. However, a sense of power is appropriate to reclaim from a sense of powerlessness - but if we look for it in terms of powerlessness we get caught in an illusion of power that costs us our core humanity - and this is writ large in the world right now. A false masculine power operates upon the denial and subjugation of the receptive and expressive because those are seen as weakening the CONCEPT of power to which wholeness of life is sacrificed.

Ok so that's deep. But at root - your core sense of worth is not determined by anything ABOUT you - unless of course you say so. That flies in the face of all societal conditioning because societal conditioning covers who we really are with a 'face'.

Movement and action from a willingness to feel a true sense of worth does more than thinking about anything. We grow what we live FROM - and that is how we lost a true appreciation of our Life; by coming FROM a need to limit and hide and present ourselves acceptable or defend ourselves from pain. The law doesn't change - but now we can use it on purpose - rather than grabbing at whatever worked for what our need was then. Some of this is appearing in the ideas in the presentation but it is adulterated with the winning/losing paradigm. Only fear of losing needs to be a winner. Who sets up to fail - but the one who HAS to be a winner?

Who Is?

In Search of the Self

Who searches for self but one who believes they have lost it!
Who is it asks the question 'who am I?
If it is a statement in the form of a question, then the assertion of "I" is defined as a 'who' - and free to identify and construct itself amidst a wide range of thought, feeling and behaviour - and then assert this 'self' while continuing to adapt to its own unrecognized reflections.
If there is a true desire to know your self - then put aside all this masquerade and abide in the true desire. IT will tell you or connect you with - all you need to know. But not as the appendage to "I am 'this' or 'that'. That is not knowing so much as rehearsing in idea and having an experience from it. There is no one who can show me a self and there is no one who can really not be who they are - regardless the presented appearances of form and communication.
Perhaps it is simply the human journey thus far, to discover or re-cognize and re-member who they are after first experiencing and recognizing who they are NOT!
Seeking in the only place where answers are kept out - is the exclusive and rejecting sense of self that mistakes itself in the idea of power over Life. Where two or more are gathered in ignorance and arrogance - Life is not recognized - nor the pain of life denied truly acknowledged.
Models, like images and symbols - are not the thing they point to - and are not the basis to define what they point to. That is back to front.

Nothing Outside You?


Friston vs Brogaard: Down the Rabbit Hole
HEAD TO HEAD: Is our experience real, or simply a construct of the brain? 


Without personal rancour let it be obvious that if experience of anything and everything was a 'product' or effect, it would not be OF the brain - which is itself effect. It may be filtered, limited or distorted THROUGH the brain (in the total sense of the body as instrument). It would be of Mind - Soul - God or whatever name you choose for non physical, non local and non temporal causation - for awareness is not apart from its object - except in thought. Nothing is more than or less than IS - but you define it so - and focus in lifetime through your acceptance of your own 'word'.
But in the course of conditioning of our own unfolded experience, the purpose of our focus in the physical sense has drifted from a conscious exploration within limitation, to struggle to survive and prevail as a limited sense of autonomy. This fearfully conflicted, contracted, densified and defended sense of self 'meets' it reflection in a like world, that seems disconnected, un-conscious and blind to the Feeling of being that is integrity of being within wholeness - hiding in fear and hiding from fear - it thinks it thinks alone - in a mind enclosed by flesh and surrounded by a world that is treacherous, other, and untrustworthy. It recognizes itself NOT in everything but puts all that self-concept excludes down, and out away - as a negative projection - as if to get rid of hated, feared self. Mind is The Projector - but what we focus upon and accept into our mind is what we give or multiply by going forth - and receive in like kind.
When fear, guilt and division are accepted and believed and reacted from as a chaos to be limited, controlled or overcome, then this becomes our focus - our thought of self-definition - and this is what we then give and receive as our communication BUT just as coercive use of communication fails to communicate a wholeness - for the form belies a hidden agenda - so does a split mind come from the attempt to make yourself in your own image or concept.
Not recognizing our own thought reflected we see 'enemy' and adversary - action feeds on reaction and the seeming 'evolution' of technological abilities of control are in fact a devolution from a natural spontaneity of communioned being... BUT these learned abilities - which have as it were, fleshed out in complex interrelationship of structures and tools is transformed by the shifting of purpose for which they are used when the personality-structure and its reality break down in the results of attempting to manually operate Life and effectively enslave it under a loveless mentality that is revealed to be wrong about its own foundation and thus undone of it AS foundation.
This no longer operates to usurp a true foundation in Cause and the reintegration of the split focus into unified purpose, operates a different 'life' than what was before - but now more and more openly coming through what was taken to be a private mind - which is the knowledge or communioned sense of not being alone - and reflects in experience of relationship in which recognition of self in other and of other in self - opens a healing of ancient hate - as an undoing of what never ultimately done in the way our imprinting conformed us to believe - and so fresh perspective restores choice that was unknowingly hidden by frameworks of apparent choices that all serve the mind that is running away from intimacy of being.
The desire to know is the other side of the coin of desiring to love and be loved. Love of truth leads to truth of love. If you truly want to know, you have to open a real relationship and feel your way. It is possible to assert rigid self-definition in a way that holds your reality apart from communication and relationship while presenting yourself the judge and invalidating all else. But isolation is pain - no matter it is denied and distributed onto 'others'. Elitism of self-specialness believes itself to be first - but is the last to release a fear-driven sense of self accept true foundation - which must at first be experienced as humiliation.

Your body and brain serve you willingly - even while you ride your power in the world. The effects of abusing and toxifying our own mind, body and world are more and more Obvious - but still we deny and kill the messengers that are our own Call - unrecognized.

Without the feeling of what informs and structures thought - is a mere evaporation of thinking while undercurrent runs the denial of feeling as the leaking out of self-hatred in all we do.
Layers and layers over layers of pretence do not change the core. Whether we like it or not, our denied imprinting is reflecting back the very terrors and fears - and rage - that the self-in-the-world- was supposed to save us from. But one does not stand in the same river twice - and the recognition of need allows perspective where before was blind panic. The need to know is also the need for true sanity. But knowing is not the translations into image, concept or symbol.
having truly known and felt known perfectly - it is your re-cognized freedom to live your life as a gift of discovery - rather than tyrannously conformed by pain, fear and guilt.
There is nothing outside Consciousness - and Consciousness is not your brain - or even 'your' mind so much as the Movement of focusing within being in which you know and feel your existence perfectly - without need to go in search of an identity to 'validate' on others - for what you give sets the measure of your receiving - and so you cannot NOT be the recipients of my giving - though your freedom to accept in accord with your own choice is as inviolate as my own.
Aligning 'will on earth with will in heaven' is pausing the mind of reaction, in desire to truly feel and know within - as one's natural or innate inheritance. This is really about reopening a channel of communication with the quality of Life within this very instant that for whatever reasons has been covered over, lost, forgotten, mistaken as threat or source of shame and denied.
When one is simply in the flow of their being - they don't stop it to ask questions that no longer hold meaning - BUT if your questions are genuine - then of course you will be prompted to notice the more of You that is always here and which you are now welcoming - regardless that the personality mind gets freaked out for a while until you bring it through to a calmer perspective.

An experience of experience is not less real that direct experience - for all experience is in some way integral to Infinite Existence or it could not be imagined. But is clearly a filtering and limiting image-perception of whatever is truly presencing Itself - right where you are.

The phrase 'down the rabbit-hole' is a reversal. For the self and world we take to be real is ALREADY down a complex of rabbit holes. The re-wakening from such an exclusive focus in such self-definition attempts to frame itself in terms of past conditionings - but you cant put the new wine into the old paradigm. There is nothing outside You - but who you truly are is always in relation with all.